Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Skeet Shooting! All the time!

In our increasingly digital age it is becoming harder and harder to pull one over on the American people.  In the simpler time of the LIFE cover of Lee Harvey Oswald, a photo manipulator actually had to cut photos and past them together to get the very controversial results.  Nowadays, you make a few clicks, and boom! Instantly you are what ever you say you are.  
The Obama administration is no stranger to manipulated photos.  The MOST controversial is of course, the birth certificate: whose authenticity is been disproved- but no one cares.  No one cares that a "scan" had been released that was actually a PDF with multiple manipulable layers, that fonts didn't match and that the background was clearly cut from another birth certificate, that there were ghosting of some letters, etc. etc.  Clearly, if the person who did this farce would have had better skillz they would have gotten away with it entirely. 

Bill and Hillary released "Dancing on the Beach" just after the Lewinsky story broke.  Obama released a photo of him in his "chair" in the war room just after Clint Eastwood mocked his absence with an empty chair and the War Room Bin Laden Raid When There Was No Live Feed photo is one of a long list of pics (manipulated or not) that are politically timed.

So we've established that the White House often likes to put out dubious photos and that the timing of those photos are often timed in a political way.  It's no stretch to feel that in this current climate of Guns and 2nd Amendment arguments, this "Skeet Shooting" photo is viewed with a raised eyebrow before we even click on the link.

Now.  The phrase, "I go skeet shooting 'all the time'." would be any loser's pathetic attempt to try to convince those who won't be convinced.  (Picture Napoleon Dynamite talking about hunting wolverines. Gaaah!)  Then add Barack's stance and limp grip which would PROVE that he fired a gun only 2-3 times EVER in his life.  One gets a recoil even with those weak skeet guns.  This would TEACH you to stand correctly or knock you over if you continued to stand like that "all the time".  


Next, let's consider that there was no recoil blur.  We see smoke so there must be a super-snappy photographer who got the perfect timing of the perfect shot of the perfect President as the musket blast blasted and the recoil recoiled.  Well, no.  There is no blur.  So there should be no smoke. The two go hand in hand.  It's obvious that the smoke was added.

The background is considerably blurred.  In order for that to occur a GREAT camera lens was used.  This was no "snapshot".  The background is perfectly blurry enough to be able to add things to it like smoke or a person.  This shot looks like something out of a video game.  Perhaps Obama was photographed somewhere else and placed in the tree line.  With his feet out of the photo it remains a possibility.  Wouldn't you feel that for a snapshot of the President skeet shooting you would back up and get the scene?  How about the other people pulling the skeets or an aide or two?  Oh yeah, that's right.  It's supposed to be about Obama so why would he include others?  

The angle of the gun.  When a skeet is fired you shoot it at the apex- when it is at it's slowest.  This could be 30-50 feet off the ground.  Otherwise, you risk the skeet getting too far away from your shot when it gets lower to the ground.  Our dear Leader's angle is almost horizontal.  This would mean that he followed that sucker till it was too far to hit and still pulled the trigger- and he missed it.  OR it could mean the following:


He posed with the gun and protective ear wear, whilst donning his favorite pair of mom-jeans.  He stood with the gun as *if* he were to fire it and the photographer took 20-30 photos of him.  The photographer/manipulator then picked his favorite photo and added some smoke from another photo maybe where he did fire.  If I were tasked with adding muzzle blasts to pretend photos I would have set up the shot exactly like that. 
After all, it's just a white lie when you say the President was skeet shooting "on a certain day" when it was a different day.  And another white lie when he "didn't fire the gun" or maybe he did and you didn't get it on camera because it blurred the shot.

Now consider yourselves more armed in your relentless pursuits of the truth.  Go get 'em!

Bigfoot skeet, Charlton Heston skeet, We the People skeet and No need to Photoshop this skeet are my creations. The General Lee Lee needs credit.

Thursday, May 17, 2012

My thoughts on gay marriage

This should clear things up a bit.  Please don't fall into the trap of arguing about the 'road to bestiality', homophobia or bigotry.  The argument against gay marriage can be summed up on the definition of the word as the Bible gives it to us.  All marriages are basically civil unions anyway.  It's just that practicing Christians believe the man-woman union counts for something more, hence the word 'marriage'.

Definition of marriage
Marriage is a religious thing set apart from other unions and legal agreements by God. The word marriage means to join two people to become one flesh and to mirror the symbolism in the monogamous relationship between CHRIST and HIS CHURCH. Christ is the male and his church is the female. This is God’s gift to mankind… the idea of a human union representing what will be in heaven- a spiritual joining of man and God forever. 

The male-female union is spelled out in the Bible, namely Song of Solomon and this is the reason two men ‘joining’ is an abomination;  not because two guys living together and promising to care for each other is somehow unholy, but because this doesn’t mirror the sanctioned relationship between the male (Christ) and the female (the Church). Not only is a gay marriage *not* sanctioned by the bible, it is forbidden. But go ahead, get civil unions, have sex, live happy, adopt, have wills, visit in the hospital etc. But please, don’t use the word ‘marriage’ because that is a holy word reserved for those who believe the teachings of the Bible which forbid male-male ‘marriages’.

Why is male-female sanctioned?
Marriage is about the relationship between Christ and the Church.  IE: Male and Female.  To claim this represents other terms is to besmirch God's plan.  In heaven God isn't going to throw away mankind and live with another deity nor allow man to have eternity with only other humans apart from God.  To join together anything other than a man and a woman would symbolize this 'abomination' of God throwing away his creation, or us having other gods (ourselves) before Him.

Be civil
When gay rights activists want to use the Church and have a priest marry them, call it marriage, etc. it is stealing from Christians' beliefs and taking away the holiness of the heterosexual union.  That's where the "attack on marriage" argument fits in.  Personally, I don't care what your semantics are.  I have good friends that are 'married' ladies with kids and gay couples that are very committed, etc.  They call it 'married' but I say hey, let's look at the doctrine behind it and they are dumbfounded.  From a doctrinal standpoint they are forever 'civil' and I am 'married'.  If Christians want to meet the argument halfway let's just all say that when ANY two people get together they enter first only into a civil union.  And then, if the two believe the teachings of the Bible of man/woman = Christ/Church and promise to live by God's laws they can "believe" that their civil union is "blessed by God" and call it "marriage".   In other words, it would be impossible for two men to agree to that, so they would remain a 'civil union'. 

There are no easy answers that make everyone happy.  But let's stop clouding the issue with arguments that don't break the problem down to it's basic roots as described above.

Mastadon Army

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Canada's Pain panels

Need pain relieving medication? Not so fast.
We've become familiar with the infamous Death Panels, where public single payer health care has to rely on cutting costs to keep things balanced.  The state can deny you a necessary treatment due to their arbitrary assessment.  You can't argue with it because they run the show, not you.  It's not this way in the U.S. yet but if we don't repeal and replace Obamacare we ALL will be suffering at some time or another.

I'm here to tell you first hand about Canadacare's Pain Panel.

A little background info for you:  In Obamacare there is a list of all available medical procedures, from hip replacements, pacemakers, cancer treatments to preventative care.  Picture this list of several hundred procedures listed in cost with the most expensive at the top.  There is a magic line cutting off the top few procedures for 40 year olds.  For 45 year olds the line drops lower, limiting the procedures available to you.  The line drops for each age group and significantly drops when you are over 65, just when you need it the most.  And when you are 83... forget it.  This is what is known as a Death Panel.  It is some arbitrary line limiting your benefits from State run Healthcare.  It is real.  It exists in Obamacare and it exists in Canadacare.  The only way to balance the costs is to cut services when most people need it.  Obama said it himself that it is better to give dear ol' grandma a pain pill rather than a life saving procedure- despite her tenacity, personal drive and non-government approved joie de vivre in order to save costs for the "rest of us".  (I won't get into Obama already taking half a trillion from Medicare to pay for solar panel research...)

On to my story:
Now in Canada for a few weeks, and after moving some heavy furniture I have had the pleasure of my back going out which resulted in a chiropractor visit and a couple of back therapy massages.  I am pleased to announce that my back is now 100% after a short time.  However, this trauma triggered SHINGLES in me, an otherwise healthy 41 yr old whose joie de vivre can not be doubted.  At the time I thought it was only a rash due to an ibuprofen allergy but as the pain worsened I sought out a doctor.  It turns out I have shingles and have had them only a few days.  Painful buggers tingling on my shoulder and chest like I was cuddling up at night with a lovely cactus.

There is a wonderful treatment for this virus; an antiviral that would slow the spread and halt the viral activity if given within 72 hours of onset.  I have had the painful shingles for just under that long so the antiviral could help slow and reverse it.  However, in Canadacare there is just one loophole between me receiving the pain relieving medication that the doctor chose to exploit.  I am an American and the vaccine is only for Canadians.  That's it.  I am now under the heavy iron hand of a Pain Panel as I sit in Canada, letting this virus run unchecked through it's terrible course.  Of course he gave me a nerve medication to lessen the pain and a Percoset prescription to ease my troubles but the viral limiting Vaccine that would stop the virus from running unchecked through its course?  Nope.  It's for Canadians only.  "You see," he explained, "we only get so much of the vaccine from Europe and we are only authorized to dole it out to Canadians." "Even if you are paying cash."

Don't let Obamacare become fully implemented into law.  Repeal it.  Vote GOP on every local and state election.  You WILL suffer in one way or another if it stands.

Painfully Yours,


Saturday, December 24, 2011

Twelve days of Holiday

Sing this to the 12 days of Christmas:
On the FIRST DAY of Holiday Obama gave to me, a book by Saul Alinsky. 
On the SECOND DAY of Holiday Obama gave to me, 2 trillion in taxes and a book by Saul Alynsky.
On the 3rd day of Holiday my leader gave to me, 3 Canadian Busses,  2 more trillion in taxes and a book by Saul Alynsky. 
On the fourth day of Holiday my leader said to me "Uh, uh, uh Uh uh, um uh." 3 Canadian Busses another 2 trillion in taxes while he spends 17 days in Hawaii paid for by me.
On the FIFTH DAY of Holiday, Obama said to me "I'll lower the seas".  Um huh uh , 3 Canadian Busses, 2 trillion in taxes,
and a book by a radical Communist/Marxist community organizer.

On the 6th day of Holiday we're not a Christian nation, No more prayer breakfasts, ENDORSES Ground Zero Moooooooosque, Quickly lights the entire Menorah, three photo ops with Chavez, 60,000 Muslims granted instant citizenship, and a book by Saul Alinsky.

On the 7th day of Holiday Obama gave to me.....  7 more unaccountable Czars, 600 missiles fired into Israel, uh, Cinco de Quatrooooooooooo!  4 Puffs of marajuana, 3 Canadian Busses, Henrietta Hughes is still struggling and a book by Saul Alinsky.

On the 8th day of Holiday Obama called Matt Lauer "Tim" 8 times,  there were 7 times that he said Corpse-man , 6 Black Panthers acquitted because they are black and for no other reason, HE TOOOOOASTS to the Queeeeeeeeeeeen incorrectly.  Four more rounds of golf, three billion grant to Solyndra, 200 missiles fired on Israel, and Class Warfare taught by Saul Alinsky...(those darned corporate jets)

On the 9th day of Holiday the teleprompter broke:

On the 10th day of Holiday our Commander in Chief makes a gaffe:  Calls Wyffels Hybrids "Waffles", Claims he's also Irish, Confuses Kansas and Texas, He's such an elegant speaker,
you can REDUCE your healthcare premiums by 3000%!!!!!!!!!!!!! Makes fun of cripples on Jay Leno, Names a dead medal of honor recipient as living, Kanye West is an ass, and Weezy is a character on Sanford and Son. (I'm, uh, coming home, uh, Weezy.   It's a big one!)

On the 11th day of Holiday Obama is mocked on Turkish TV and  Putin calls him an idiot, Korea launches missiles, God Damn America that's in the bible, Kinetic military action, promises to close Gitmo, Arab Spring is rising, FIVE TRAMPLED IN A VOUCHER STAMPEEEEEEEEDE. Obamacare is tanking, Starts 3 wars, Blames mistakes on Bush, and a book by Saul Alinksy.

On the 12th day of Holiday our leader gave to me:  a lawsuit against Arizona, a flip-flop on Mubarak, A birth certificate in PDF form with many individual separate layers, he walked away from debt talks, turned a memorial for those killed by Jared Loughner into a campaign stop, lost a freaking drone, skipped Endowed by our Creator, Occupiers are cool, NASA is now for muslim outreach, messes up the oath of office, electricity costs necessarily skyrocket, 

offends every true Catholic with his stance on abortion, keeps on smoking, does a 180 on Sudan and the Darfur genocide, Muslim prayers are beautiful, Grants 1,000+ waivers for healthcare premiums, AIG is evil, Sharia law is growing, He loves Kominsky park,

Credit rating downgraded, Claims he's the 4th best president, Makes fun of Nancy Reagan when it was really Hillary who actually channeled, Bankrupts coal power plants,  he fights for money for Black Farmers who don't exist, hides all his school records, pushes for sex-ed for 4th graders, financial and housing crisis meltdown, repeals Clinton's "don't ask, don't tell",

skirts the constitution, takes full credit for Osama's murder even though water boarding made it happen, meanwhile the entire Navy Seal Team is betrayed and killed,
throws Israel under the bus, Kensyian economics, Mexicans are the true Americans, Fast and Furious, 

(one could just go on and on)   STEALS 500 BILLION from Medicaaaaaaare, Michigan's in the toilet, just inflate your tires, put the blame on Bush, and try to find a part-time job in this economy. And God bless us, every one.

If anyone wants to record this, just link to me or send me a note on twitter.  Thanks!

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

South Carolina bill is a strategic move

We learned today that five lawmakers from South Dakota have introduced a bill that will require all SC residents to carry a firearm "sufficient to provide for their ordinary self-defense" within six months of turning 21.  Republican Hal Wick is supporting the silly bill knowing full well that it will not pass the litmus test of common sense and will be "killed" soon. 

Unphased, Mr. Wick said “Do I or the other cosponsors believe that the State of South Dakota can require citizens to buy firearms? Of course not. But at the same time, we do not believe the federal government can order every citizen to buy health insurance."  

Why is this considered a strategic move?  With the recent developments in Florida with a district Judge's ruling that Obamacare was unconstitutional because it forces people to purchase something, Mr. Wick has deftly added to the hurdles that anyone opposing U.S. District Judge's Robert Vinson's ruling has to take into account.  After the SC bill is deemed unconstitutional, it is simply a matter of connecting the dots to show that Obamacare is entirely and utterly unconstitutional because it does the same silly thing.  

No one should be forced by the government to buy anything and people have made this point to no avail.  Now, they have to face the fact that when the exact same law is rejected in South Carolina on constitutional grounds, it can, should and will be also deemed unconstitutional in Florida.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

3 steps to take to avoid TSA patdowns. IMPORTANT INFORMATION

Step One: When going through TSA security remove ALL metal objects from your person.
Time and time again I see people getting a free grope from security because they forgot to remove change from their pockets or take off their watch. Step One: simple. Take off your metal and keep your dignity.

Step Two: Avoid 20th century medical advances.

Don't have any knee operations, hip replacements, or ever break a bone etc. because this can result in titanium screws and pins, metal skull plates, artificial heart valves etc. which will promptly result in a TSA love pat scenario. Step two: simple. Avoid modern healthcare or your naked image may be leaked to the internet.

Step Three: Don't fly to or from an American destination.

Most important to realize is that the Obama administration influences TSA's operations via terror threat security levels and by throwing the most effective screening method out the window: ie- profiling.  Therefore flights within the US will be more subject to TSA's whims than other countries.  Step Three: Abandon your country or you may become a sexual assault victim.

In Hamburg, Germany (terminal 2) the line for the naked scan was optional and many people clamored for the line out of curiosity. Germans typically are also devoid of any hang ups about public displays of nudity as seen by their public pools and parks. Nudity is a way of life here for these conservative, God-fearing travelers. With out worry of profiling accusations (because Germany is relatively free from successful terror attacks) coupled with their love for exposing themselves, you should be able to avoid getting the ol' slap and tickle if you fly here.

Here's how I put these three steps to good use to avoid the TSA screener I would like to lovingly refer to as Big Gay Al.
Flying from Hamburg's Terminal 2 today to the lovely city of Munich (Step 3) I recounted how lucky I was not to have had any need for modern medical treatments during my lifetime that would have left metal in my body (Step 2). As I walked past the optional bodyscan line touted as being faster, I saw the poor sod getting scanned multiple times because in his induced rushed state he kept putting his hands down too soon and apparently blurred the image. When they finally got him to stand still long enough for a good scan he probably had absorbed enough radiation to transform into the Hulk.   *citation needed

I stepped into the line with the regular metal detector and saw a very chunky German guy with frosted blond highlights, an ear ring and his ID card on a bright purple lanyard as he eyed the potential rub down clients. I removed everything down to my button front shirt, jeans, socks and a smile (Step 1) and placed my articles on the conveyor. Big Gay Al just had the lovely opportunity to cop a feel or four with the two guys ahead of me who had several necklaces each, belts, shoes, change, etc. on their person. I was thinking, 'I wonder if I needed a pat check if it were possible to request a hetero-patter' but I figured the very audacity of asking might land me on a watch list.

He snapped his unchanged rubber glove as his eyes gave me a dilated double take and said "Nächste, bitte!" He motioned with two fingers for me to step through and I knew that he could give me a rub-dub wham-bam thank-you-ma'am based on his own discretion anyway, despite my efforts to follow the three Steps. To his apparent dismay not a single warning light went off. "Danke schön." he sighed as he pointed for me to collect my belongings.

The end.

Friday, October 15, 2010

American Hero

Dear occasional reader and 4 followers!
I have poured my heart and time into a short video that will help GET OUT THE VOTE on Nov. 2.  I made this with a slight propogandist take on the whole first few months of the Obama White House, not that Obama needs much help sinking his own ship but my subtle pushes might help his ship sink faster.

This is the vein of a movie trailer inspired by Don LaFontaine (RIP) who did the voice overs for thousands of movie trailers and coined the phrase "In a world...", "This summer!", "One man", "Now more than ever!" etc.  It was made entirely with silly windows movie maker and I used a crappy digital recorder to put my voice on there.  I hope you enjoy this movie trailer, starring an American Hero.

I've promoted this on twitter via @mastadonarmy.  Please follow!